We swapped rooms where I live and cleared up a wall. It’s the room I painted a rich red. I immediately thought of this painting in dark cherry metallic. It was for my show Dark Glamour about 3 years ago. I’ve had it hidden since then. It’s 36″x48″ and I had to walk it to BART which is a half hour walk – then get it on the train and get it home. It gets heavy after you’ve just started. I’ve loved this thing – hated it – loved it again. It’s all in metallics which change as you move around them with the light. It was nice to see it on my red wall. My roommate has a Noir movie collection and I thought a Noir babe was appropriate for the house.
Worked on this today for my show Poèmes en Verre opening June at the Stained Glass Garden. I was so depressed yesterday and today I’m getting it done. I had to go to the Stained Glass Garden for supplies and was surprised the girl knew who I was and that I was having a show there. They want more images and I’m not halfway done. I went back to the studio and made this happen. Nobody knows what goes into a work of art. I had times today where I was cleaning glass on myself and cutting my clothes not myself, but I found it oddly satisfying. Fucked up making something pretty. C’est mois.
Not coping with the world today, I went to the studio. I have many projects going but my show at the Stained Glass Garden pulls on me. I picked my favorite vintage French postcard man for this one. The frame is Deco – the man could be Deco – the design needs to be Deco. So I sketched this out. I can see it with a colored center and clear texture for the exterior curves. It’s hard coming up with interesting designs that are simple and fulfilling for such a small space in these frames.
I’ve mostly completed the cd artwork for Marilyn Mitchell’s rock cd “Be Alive!”. Going to print soon. We’ve begun talking about the video for her song “Look the Other Way”. Our themes are transformation, gender and identity. She’s my transgender rock star and I want to do this right. For me, I struggled with my own identity when I was young. I looked through a trunk where this drawing has sat for some 30 years. I was attracted to men and women and this showed up in my collages. Everything had a torn edge. I was self-destructive and dark. Eventually I met a man that saved me from myself. While I will never know what it is like to be transgender, my friends tell me their experiences. I understand the struggle with identity because I lived it. Looking back on these sketchbooks from that time – I was not about trying to do something pretty – I wanted something powerful.